9 Badass Umbrellas To Fight El Nino

andy dufresne escapes from Shawshank prison

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It’s been a crazy few weeks of weather around the nation – tornados in Tennessee for Christmas, serious rain and historic flooding in the Midwest this week — and it’s about to get crazier with El Nino coming to the U.S. as well.

But we can’t just sit inside like a bunch of sissies. We have to go out and get our drink on go to work. But this kind of weather needs to be battled against with more than just a cheap umbrella that will probably break or leak within minutes of use.

We need to elevate our umbrella game for this kind of weather. We need a badass umbrella and luckily, there are a few out there to choose from.

Here are 9 of the best:

The Polite Umbrella

This umbrella is designed to contract to allow others on the sidewalk with you to pass by and not get banged in to the head by your umbrella.

The Pileus Internet Umbrella

this is the pileus internet umbrella

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This is an umbrella that is connected to the internet and projects the web on the inside of the umbrella. You can look up the weather while you are already in the weather…

Light Saber Umbrella

This is what every Star Wars fan needs during the storm. There are different colors to play with, but aside from that, they are just awesome.

Bluetooth Umbrella

bluetooth umbrella pieces

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This is a rain shield that can hook into your blue tooth so that you can do some mobile rain walking and stay in contact with all your buddies at all times.

The Weather Forecasting Umbrella


Not sure if this is completely necessary – given the internet, weather channels, your phone with weather on the home screen and many other weather sevices – but this is a cool one. The handle changes colors to tell you what the weather is going to be by connecting the umbrella to your wifi.

Sword Umbrellas

These umbrellas come in various style of swords, but the Samurai sword umbrella is one of the most popular. Grab one of these to ninja your way through the rain… and hope a cop doesn’t arrest you.

Tandem Umbrella

a picture of a couple sharing a tandem umbrella

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This is the tandem bike of umbrellas (marketing words, not mine). But it’s really for you not getting soaked because your girl is hogging the umbrella. So genius.

Hidden Flask Umbrella

an umbrella handle with a hidden flask

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If there is one thing that really sucks about being in awful, stormy weather, it’s being in awful, stormy weather and forgetting your flask. Luckily, you can have one built right into your umbrella for booze on the go in the rain.

The Gunbrella

one of the coolest gadgets ever - the gunbrella

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This comes in several gun designs to satisfy gun lovers, including modern handguns, Old West pistols and rifles. Just good luck carrying it onto the plane…

umbrella from Pixar's Monster's U.

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So enjoy fighting some of the worst weather recorded across our great land. Now that you’ve been shown some awesomely badass umbrellas, you should have no problem out there… in theory.

Thank you, umbrellas!

sexy girl in a bikini with an umbrella

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