25 Reasons to Love Krampus, the Demon of Christmas

Are you familiar with Krampus?  Our friends throughout Germany, Austria, Bavaria and beyond cooked him up as a sort of counter to Saint Nicholas.  He’s basically a Christmas monster that shows up with Santa Claus and while Santa bings gifts to good boys and girls, Krampus punishes bad kids and if they’re particularly bad, they get stuffed in his sack and taken back to the lair.  What happens in the lair?  Ha ha, festive treats!  Or maybe he just eats them, I dunno.

  1. He’s the Satan of Christmas
  2. He’s proof Germans can’t enjoy themselves
  3. The first syllable of his name is Kramp
  4. Few other modern beliefs really support the insertion of children into sacks
  5. It’s funnier if kids go to sleep on Christmas Eve in abject fear and uncertainty
  6. Krampus sounds like cram ass
  7. Christmas really needs more villains
  8. More kids eaten by Krampus means more presents for everyone else
  9. Good to see minorities getting jobs
  10. Keeps the child-sized sack makers in business
  11. Shames other holiday villains like the Easter Badger and the Arbor Day Boggart
  12. Gives awesome Secret Santa gifts
  13. May be an exception to Rule 34
  14. Everyone loves a horned, goat demon
  15. The following 11pictures (which makes this work out to 25 if you don’t count this entry. Word)

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