15 of the Worst Cereals Ever

Cereal seems pretty easy.  Something crunchy, some sugar, maybe a marshmallow and bam, breakfast is served.  But sometimes it gets screwed up bad.  Real bad.

1. Sir Grapefellow

Imagine a crunchy, fake grape cereal brought to you by a remarkably fancy pilot.  Are you hungry yet?  No.

2. King Vitaman

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Hey look kids, we didn’t get a cool cartoon spokesman, we got the guy who keeps telling you he has puppies in his van.

3. Punch Crunch

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Captain Crunch cuts your mouth up but does it taste like fruit punch?  It sure does.

4. Bigg Mixx

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Wow, it’s like you swept the floor after making all the other cereals and dumped it into a box.  Delicious.

5. Kellogg’s OJs

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Do you know why there’s no orange flavored cereal on the market today? Because no one wants crunchy ass orange cereal.

6. Yummy Mummy

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Count Chocula’s red headed step child, Yummy Mummy was the only cereal that had the balls to name itself after what is ostensibly a MILF.

7. Kiss Krunch

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What band would you most like to feel in your mouth?  Yeah.

8. New Kids on the Block

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OK, last chance, what band would you most like to feel in your mouth?

9. Breakfast with Barbie

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Pink cereal bits shaped like hearts and cars.  Make ‘em nice and shallow at a young age.

10. Urkel Os

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Because the worst TV character of all time should be a cereal.

11. Prince of Thieves

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“What do kids love? Cereal and Kevin Costner?” – cereal executive, shortly before losing his job.

12. Crazy Cow

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It was coated in strawberry milk mix because gross. And also invokes fears of Mad Cow, always a good sign.

13. Crunchy Loggs

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Oh God yes, a log.  A brown, crunchy log. 

14. Fruit Brute

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Yummy Mummy’s defective cousin, it’s the fruity werewolf because why not?

15. Liquid Cereal

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Arguably there’s no way this is cereal someone spit into a can and yet try to get that picture out of your head.