11 Ways To Tell If She Wants To Watch A Movie Or “Watch A Movie”

This is probably one of the smoothest moves in the book. I’m not sure what book, but when a guy and girl are on a date, all of a sudden many men become huge film buffs by the end of the night; “Hey do you want to come back to my place and watch a movie?”

When a guy says “watch a movie” we all know that he really wants to do is take the young lady to the drive thru. He wants to butter her popcorn. He .. wants to have sex!  So how is a guy supposed to know if a girl wants to just sit alone in a dark room with him and simply watch a movie; or if she wants to you know… “watch a movie?”

1. She Sits Down Next To You On The Couch

This is the classic sign that maybe watching a movie might be “watching a movie.” If sitcoms have taught us anything it’s that if you put on a scary movie and she will jump in your arms at the first sign of anything scary. Also note how many cushions away from you she is; the less cushions between you and your date, the better your chances.

2. She Has Left Her Shoes On

However if your lady friend sits down next to you on the couch, you had better check her shoes. If she leaves her shoes on during the movie this means she is prepared to run away from you at any moment.

3. She Wants To Watch Ken Burns’ The Civil War Nine Part Documentary

If your lady wants to watch something really long, then unfortunately chances are we aren’t talking about your “really long” masterpiece. You both will be asleep by the time the movie ends and that awkward question of “so what do you want to do next?” pops up where you planned on answering “You, girl.”

4. She Wants To Watch Some Movie Recap Videos On YouTube

If you two would-be love birds can’t decide what to watch and she wants to keep things short; you might be in luck. If she is perusing your stash of 90 minute comedies or just wants to hit up YouTube to look over some 30 second movie trailers, the coming attractions might also include a hot love scene.

5. She Is Eating The Garlic And Onion Chips

The type of movie snacks that are eaten during the film viewing is a huge insight into your lady’s post cinematic activity schedule. If she dives head first into the week old bag of Brie Cheese Flavored Doritos your roommate left out on the coffee table you may be just watching a movie- no quotation marks.

6. She Is Snacking On Gum, Altoids And Peppermint Patties

If your lady is not interested in any food, but more items that will keep her nice and fresh, such as a Tic-tac and gum; then the only dancing movie snacks you’re going to have to worry about is your own hotdog. “Let’s all go to the bedroom! Let’s all go to the bedroom! Let’s all go to the bedroom to get ourselves a treat!”

7.  She Is Sharing One Bowl Of Popcorn Although She Could Have Had Two Separate Bowls

If your potential off screen romantic interest brings out one bowl of popcorn for you to share then the reviews might be in your favor. Now she will have to sit next to you on the couch and your hands will be in close proximity darting in and out, in and out, getting all of that greasy popcorn all over her hands that she will have to lick off.. OK I’m done.

8.  Even Though It’s Warm She Wants To Get Under The Couch Blanket

One of the best ways to tell if your date wants to “watch a movie” is if the room is hot yet she wants to get under the couch blanket with you. She doesn’t even mind your fart scented blanket that has been sitting on your couch unwashed for the past four years.

9. She Is Laughing At The Love Guru

There is one big way to tell if a lady is DTF or just down to watch whatever you got at Redbox that night; she is enjoying herself no matter what is on the screen even if it is terrible.  You could have an advanced screener copy of “Paul Blart Part 6” and if your lady is laughing hysterically at the screen, well then you sir might owe Kevin James a thank you.

10. She Doesn’t Allow Talking During The Movie

If she is concentrating on the plot of the film like she is studying to take the bar exam, then I’m afraid you might as well break out a bag of those Brie Cheese Flavored Doritos. Just don’t crunch them too loudly or you will get the “shhh!”

11.  Between Watching The Real Version And The Porn Version: She Chooses The Porno Version

If you invite a girl back to your place to watch a movie and she suggestions any film with the words “Not The” before the title and “XXX” after it; you sir are in for wild night. However don’t watch Not The Wizard Of OZ XXX – that’s messed up.

Probably the number one way to tell if your date thinks that watching a movie means “watching a movie” is if she wants to go to Movies On Break and instantly stream one of these feature length “Movies To Get You Laid!”

Check out these cinematic aphrodisiacs at the links below and let us know how “watching a movie” went!

Kama Sutra

"Maya, a lowly servant, and Tara, a noble princess, are both raised together in 16th century India. Maya's beauty and her skills of seduction learnt through the Kama Sutra lead her to get revenge on Tara by seducing her husband on her wedding day."

Giving It Up

"Womanizing New Yorker Ralph attempts to identify the causes of, and find a remedy for, his so-called addiction to sex, in order to win the love of a woman he respects."

Bending All The Rules

"A beautiful, free-spirited photographer confronts her fear of commitment when two wildly different men wage a fierce and funny battle for her affections."