Being a true fan means more than just watching every game and talking down to people who care about you when your team doesn’t win. You have to prove to the team of your choice that you are willing to do just about anything to show how much you love them. You have to show them you are willing to give up all of your worldly possessions, risk your life for them and even commit murder if some dares besmirch their name or trademarked logo.
If you’re not willing to go full-Gollum for your team, you can start by getting a tattoo that shows how much you love them. A New York Mets fan did just that except he got his before the Mets finished their run at the World Series and his tattoo proclaimed that they are “World Champs” . Here’s some other inked fans who picked up a side of regret for free when they got their team tattoo.
1. 2015 Cowboys World Champs
The Mets’ fans tattoo may have been a little premature but at least his odds of it being accurate were 50-50. This Dallas Cowboys fan feels like he’s invincible when it comes to odds and declared his football team as this year’s Super Bowl champs, even though they are 2-5 so far this season. He’d be better off getting a tattoo that says, “I’ll be struck by lightning while a shark eats me!”
2. Seattle Seahawks Back To Back Champs
Even if you loathe the Seattle Seahawks, you’e got to feel some sympathy for this fan who got the phrase “Back to Back Champs” inked on his left shoulder. He not only had a 50-50 shot of getting it right but he had a previous Super Bowl win to back up his bet. It’s like a student who sleeps with his teacher to get a good grade and still fails the final exam.
3. AVFC Cup Winners 2014
If I knew or cared about soccer, I’m sure I’d understand why this Aston Villa tattoo is a bad idea besides the fact that it’s related to soccer.
4. Cleveland 2015 NBA Champs
There aren’t many rules to getting a team tattoo but here’s one I think we can all agree with: If your favorite team is from Cleveland, never get one that says they are the “Champs.” Of course, this one really had to hurt because Cleveland got a much needed glimmer of hope since LeBron James made his way back to his home state’s struggling team. Does LeBron need to tell this fan that he’s “sorry” now?
5. University of Kentucky National Champions
Few sports fans are more loyal and foolhardy than college sports fans. They dedicate their fandom to a league that refuses to pay players while raking in billions of dollars. Some of them didn’t even go to the school they are a fan of, which is their right but they probably would have stopped themselves from committing such an illogical act if they went to college. Take this U of Kentucky basketball fan whose team didn’t actually win the National Championship
6. Penn State Tattoo
It’s true that former Penn State football coach Joe Paterno had a storied legacy in college sports but he flushed it away when revelations from an investigation revealed how he and other college officials covered up the heinous acts of assistant coach Jerry Sandusky in order to preserve something as meaningless as a football program. Imagine having a tattoo of that guy on your arm for the rest of your life. You’d wear two layers of long sleeve shirts for the rest of your life, even if you moved to the equator.
7. Nationals World Series Champs 2015
Being a Washington Nationals fan basically means you don’t have many aspiring goals in life. Even pretending that they have a shot at a World Series win should be a clinical symptom of some kind of mental illness. So, yes, it’s weird that this fan got a “World Series Champs” tattoo for his Nationals but at least he had the good sense to put it on his feet where no one could see it and hire a 6-year-old child to write it out for him so if anyone saw, they could barely read such atrocious handwriting.
8. St. Louis Blues 2015 Stanley Cup Champions
This fan of the St. Louis Blues got a tattoo proclaiming his favorite team to be “Stanley Cup Champions” but he did it for an even more stupid reason than blind fan faith. He won a morning radio show contest that asked listeners what they would be willing to do to get a free St. Louis Blues tattoo. His answer pales in comparison to getting one of the world’s dumbest tattoos but at least letting your wife sleep with the entire hemisphere would only cause him mental damage as opposed to mental and physical damage.
9. Boston Bruins Stanley Cup Champions Fail
You don’t have to be a fan to get a dumb sports tattoo. The Boston Bruins’ Brad Marchand decided to get a tattoo celebrating his team’s Stanley Cup win in 2013 but the tattoo artist still found a way to screw it up. And if you can’t figure out the artist’s mistake, never get a tattoo or at least not one with any words in it.
10. New York Jets Tat Fail
Even coaches don’t make the best decisions when it comes to body art. Longtime New York Jets coach Rex Ryan had a tattoo of his wife clothed only in a New York Jets jersey with the No. 6 on it, the number of former Jets QB Mark Sanchez. So when he got fired and picked up by the Buffalo Bills, he had a mark of failure on him that would have proclaimed his and his wife’s love for Bills punter Colton Schmidt. Fortunately, he could afford to get it changed unlike the average guy who thinks face tattoos won’t prevent them from nailing any future job interviews.
Danny Gallagher is a freelance blogger, writer, humorist and ink taste tester. He can be found on Twitter @thisisdannyg.